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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

Jesse helped save you from the green dumpsters and now you’ll help save him from going through his procedure alone. You’re there for each other during the worst times of your lives to help support and lift each other up.

Down deep in your soul, you knew you deserved more in this life, even in your darkest hours, and your fierce intelligence and sense of self wouldn’t tolerate it. The cabin came along just when you needed it. The little farmhouse came along just when you needed it. The universe provides, even if she is a nasty bitch… and after the car issues, I’m like, seriously?!?! Love you guys and here to support you however we can. 🩷

Can’t not mention all the wonderful Jonie photos!!! 💙💙💙 seeing all his puppy photos brought all the feels!! He was a little Puggy savior for you when you needed him most. 💙💙

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Ooooooooouuuuffffff.... okay, the fact that you drew a parallel between Jesse "saving" me from the wrath of the Green Dumpsters and now, kinda "paying it forward" as he navigates this whole brain tumour situation... I freaking LOVE that.

During this time when I was struggling with my external environment (the basement at Divine, the neon green dumpsters) I knew I didn't deserve it, but I still had a lot of work to do to TRULY believe it. I think something big shifted when I finally quit/"lost" my job at Hotel Arts that opened up a world of possibility with Grumble Farm in the Kootenays. The Universe was kinda like, alright Brandy! Let's see what you're made of! It was a bit of a wobbly start throughout those first few years, but I learned so, so, SOOOO much, both about business, and myself. I know without a doubt that I have the tools to navigate this next "chapter", too, and to make the best of it while striving towards something better at the same time.

I was hoping there would be some appreciation for the baby Jonie photos! I don't have too many photos and like, ZERO videos of him as a little one because I had him as a puppy back before "content creation" was really a big thing, but I'm so grateful I have these handful of photos of him and us from the very beginning of our love story. It's no wonder Jonie and I bonded to the depths we did over the years - it's absolutely crazy how much we went through together 🥹💙

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And also… I am sad too. The cabin is and was a dream that you’re so blessed to have had as a part of in your life! I will miss the sunrises you shared and of course the birds. The wildlife and the snow content (always the snow content). Bye, beautiful little cabin in the woods. I loved you too, even if from a distance. 🌲👋

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The fucking snow 😂 I'll never forget what we went through with all of that for the rest of my life!! I'm really excited to see what birds live on and pass through this new farm property. I feel like it's just going to be a whole new ecosystem with so much to observe and learn about. Many birdie nerdie updates to come... 🤓

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May 21Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

And the 🦃!!

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How could I forget the gobbler!?

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Ok, Karen’s comment. 😭 👆

Brandy, what a beautiful story you have. It seems despite sickness, tragedy and loss, there’s nothing life has thrown at you that you haven’t been able to get through — think about that for a moment. You’ve survived 100% of your bad days.

As difficult as it all has been, and continues to be, remember that not everyone could walk in your shoes and get through another night like you have. Everything has its season. This is just another transition that will add another chapter to your deeply beautiful story.

You are an incredible human being that I’m so happy to have stumbled upon many moons ago. Always remember that you are loved and the gifts and vulnerability that you share with the world are so appreciated. Big, big, big love to you guys. 🩷

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I teared up a little at Karen's comment too lol.

I've wanted to write a memoir for literal years (duh), and for the past like, FEW years I kept thinking - how do you end your story when you're very much still living it? When we moved to the cabin last fall after Jonas died, I was like... OoOooOooOoOoOh, this is the PERFECT ENDING! But now I'm kinda like... actually, the ending doesn't end at "happily ever after" and realized that an even better ending would be finding peace with saying goodbye to what I hoped would be happily ever after.

When you said "not everyone could walk in your shoes and get through another night like you have" it reminded me of something I've never shared with anyone except my mom, Jesse, and my therapist. After my ex left at the end of 2019, up until my ileostomy reversal surgery, every single morning when I woke up with Jonas, Fern, and Ivy I would roll over to them and whisper, "We made it through the night!" It always felt like I was in a little wolf den with them, and so long as we were still alive and together each morning, it meant that life was still marching forward. I even thought about calling my book We Made It Through the Night... but there are many titles on the table. lol. 💙

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

Brandy you are an extraordinary human. I knew you were pretty great, but after learning more about your backstory, extraordinary is the better adjective. I am bowled over by your ability to do what needs to be done while keeping your spirit fed and persevering in the face of real hardships. You are an inspiration to me. Thank you for laying bare the dark times as well as sharing the golden times.

You will find your way to a happy place again. Something even better than the cabin is on the horizon for you and Jesse. When you finally see it and feel it, I can’t wait to read all about it! Meanwhile I look forward to your Summer adventures and of course following Jesse on his road back to health after the surgery.

Sending you both love and sunshine!❤️❤️❤️

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Sandra 😭 I haven't the foggiest clue as to how I got so lucky to have you stumble upon me and my story and come into my online life, however long ago that was. Every time I hear from you I feel so incredibly seen and heard, and that is SUCH A SPECIAL GIFT to me. 🎁

I feel that since I found my way to such a happy place here at the cabin after EVERYTHING... that I have to remember I'm capable of finding my way again! Being here at the cabin gave me so much clarity about the way I want to feel, that I know exactly what to look for (and more importantly, what NOT to look for).

In the meantime, this upcoming summer is absolutely going to pretty funny in the storytelling department with all of the travelling and animal shenanigan's we're about to get up to, haha. As devastating as leaving the cabin is, I'm honestly really looking forward to what's to come. And I do really look forward to sharing about Jesse's victorious recovery, too 💙

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May 25Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

Pure Kismet and I’m the lucky one!❤️

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

I really enjoyed reading this Brandy. You are so evolved and see and ferl things so deeply. It’s such a breath of fresh air. I am sad that you have to leave the cabin but know you will create a beautiful life in the next spot too.

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Thank you so much, Rebecca 💙 I still can't really believe I wrote this over the course of two days on a whim, but I am SO GLAD I DID. There is so much beauty in the future, you're right - I figured out how to cultivate it once, and I can do it again. I look forward to sharing that journey too!

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

I love when I learn knew things about your story ❤️ Thanks for sharing with such beautiful openness and vulnerability as always

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I think at this point, Lauren, you know more about me than my Mom does. LOL ❤️

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

I love knowing all the things 😎❤️🥰

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

Oh my gosh. I’ve been following you for quite the time that I remember all of this. Your new home will be perfect for now as long as all of you are together. Hugs to you my friend

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Wholey shit! Really?! That long?!! Crazy!!!!! It's wild that everything I shared in this post, I have shared in some capacity online since Instagram was born in 2011, which is simultaneously when ALL of this happened (getting Jonas, working in the basement at Divine, etc). I'll have to go back even further in my story to surprise you one of these days Nancy! 💙

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May 21Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

I am so honored to learn new things about you Brandy. I didn’t know the specifics prior to your iliostomy reversal. My comment on your last vog about your resiliency was an understatement. I wish you were as proud of your amazing abilities to adapt, overcome, and grow from each obstacle that has avalanched (this is how I see it) in front of you. I know how difficult it is to stay positive in the aftermath of each “setback”, but I truly believe you will find a way to find peace no matter where you land. You know you and Jesse are in my daily thoughts and prayers. Disability income limits my good intentions. I wish I could do more than send love and hugs along with prayers. 💙💙💙🐾🐾💙💙💙 I await the next installment of your new adventure.

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Omg Lisa. The stories leading up to the moment of my reversal are absolutely insane 😅 I had to leave SOOOOOO MUCH out of this post because I only had a couple of days to write it! It's extremely bare-bones, but I can't wait to dive in and tease out some of the nuances and threads and connections and synchronicities between all of the things I did share, here. It's quite a magnificent story and I seriously need to sit my ass down to start writing it in it's entirety 💙

Your presence here means so much, Lisa. Your "good intentions" shine through with every comment you write and share with me!

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May 23Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

Please see chat on Instagram and let me know. Vicki

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I'll go digging in there today! 💙

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May 21Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

Brandy I just want to say how much I appreciate you and letting us into your life and sharing so much with us. More and more I learn about you the more I’m like holy shit because you’ve obviously been through a lot but also I can see so many similarities (the binge eating and suicidal ideation in particularly) My heart breaks that you’re having to leave that beautiful cabin but I’m so glad we got to experience it all with you. Lastly OMG LITTLE JONIE 😍 I love how he was just like yes I’m in a display cabinet hi 🥺😂

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Claaaaaiiiiiiirrreeeee - thank you!! It still blows my mind that I have people in my life who take the time to read/watch/listen to me share these stories about my life... I am just so lucky.

It's interesting whenever I open up about those "secret" or more hidden parts of myself... depression, binge eating, suicidal ideation... how many others then feel safe to share that they can relate. Personally for me, sharing openly about this kinda stuff is kind of a big "fuck you" to the surface-level garbage that the internet and social media is so saturated with these days.

While I obviously share about the things that break my heart, my FAVORITE thing EVER has always been sharing about the things that make me feel otherworldly amounts of joy. And the cabin was one of those things... and a big part of me is devastated that I won't get to do that anymore, because where we're moving to is such a downgrade and I don't feel inspired to share about it AT ALL. I'm so incredibly driven and motivated to find myself somewhere that makes me feel the way this cabin did, so that I can share about it's beauty non-stop the way I did, here 💙🌿

The display cabinet! Hahaha. Jonas was ALWAYS obsessed with cubby holes and cupboards and little spaces like that! More often than not when people came up to the body piercing counter they wouldn't even notice him, but when they did they were like OH MY GOD IS THAT REAL 😆 He absolutely loved it in there 🥰

THANK YOU FOR BEING A PART OF MY INTERNET LIIIIIIFFFEEE!!!

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May 21Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

I love hearing about your life Brandy, and your journeys that got to where you are now. Sweet baby Jonas in the glass cabinet 💙🥹. My eyes welled up at just reading the title of this news letter... Goodbye forever sweet cabin... as I know how much you love it. I'm sorry you have to leave, but I do look forward to reading all about your new pug dog cat sheep cow duck and chicken sitting jobs coming up! And of course new adventures in your new home while Jesse recovers. Hugs to all xx

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Lorraine, thank you SO MUCH for reading this. As you probably know... I've been struggling with people on Instagram who continuously tell me that they don't have the time, and it's been killing me lately. I'm not sure I value anything more than the people in my online and real life taking intentional time to read, watch, or listen to the things that I pour my heart and soul into sharing with others. So thank you, thank you, thank you.

Haha, Jonie in the glass cabinet. He LOVED it in there! A full 360 degree view to keep an eye on my every move 👀

Jesse's recovery, our new little farm home and the adventures coming up with all of these funny little animals are going to be.... excellent material, to say the least. I'm sad, and this is very hard, but there is so much good to come. So so so so so much. And I'm so lucky to have you & everyone else to share it with 💙

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You are right, there is SO MUCH good to come! I'm so happy you are feeling positive about it as I know you are devasted inside about leaving the cabin. And moving is soooo bloody stressful at the best of times, let alone what you and Jesse are dealing with! I love reading your content, learning new stuff about you and watching your videos! I'm afraid you are stuck with me!! 😂🥰

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May 21Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

This was amazing, you are amazing! I love all the baby pics of Jonie and I will never forgot those freaking turkeys!! I’m excited and honoured to be apart of your next chapter 💛

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Ahhhhhhh, thanks Jess 💙 Wholey hell, I will remember living amongst this brood of wild turkeys for the rest of my freaking life 😂 As sad as I am about this whole cabin situation, I'm honestly really, really excited for the adventure to come. It's going to be a weird one, lol. Let's gooooo!

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May 21Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

You are an inspiration. I love hearing your story and I'm honored to continue to follow it!! What a throwback reading about the fricken hotel breakfast place! Cheers, little cabin - thank you for recharging Brandy's soul and sending her off ready for a new adventure 💙🧡❤️

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Hahahahaha the hotel breakfast place!! I remember VERY WELL when you came into my life Bianca and it was EXACTLY in the middle of this time at Hotel Arts, when I was living at that apartment downtown with the pugs. I would share about the Calgary tower every night when it got dark, revealing what colour the lights were because they changed all the time!

I love that you framed the cabin as a Soul Recharge. In a way, it did feel like a little nature retreat following Jonie's death. There couldn't have been a better place to rest and process and re-group. And now, off we go! 💙🌿 Love you forever, Biancs!

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

This brave and vulnerable post squeezes my heart, Brandy. I am happy to hear that you have found another place in the Kootenays to courageously explore and make your own. Sending big hugs and much love, to you, Jesse and the girls. And please, the next time you venture back to ‘the city on Kootenay Lake’ let me know - I would love to meet up for coffee and a chat,

(if you have the capacity of course) xo

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Ahhh Doreen 💙 I feel so lucky to have you here. I'm pretty sure there's you, and one other person who lives locally who actually follows along with my Kootenay-inspired adventures! It's always so cool that I can chat with you about the area because unless you've been here, it's impossible to really "get it" 🤪

Getting together for a coffee is so incredibly overdue. We'll still be in Nelson semi-often, I am certain of it. We'll make it happen. We will! (And THANK YOU for reading this!)

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May 25Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

We will!!

And yes, the Kootenay lifestyle is unique (trying to fly out of here, especially in winter, is something ‘others from elsewhere’ don’t understand!). Plus, the sheer remoteness and stunning beauty of this place has to be experienced to be understood. It’s an honour to be with you on your journey and read your heartfelt newsletters and post on Substack. Yay warrior women of the Koots! ❤️

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LOVE IT!! So so so so so much!! Do we…. need to start a club of some kind for Warrior Women of the Koots? (also, LMFAO “others from elsewhere” 😆)

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Yes!! Let’s start a WWOK club. Could be fabulous 🤩

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Yes, let’s start a WWOK club! Could be fabulous 🤩

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

I am sorry you are having to move again and start all over again I wish there was more I could do for you than pray for you. You have come so far in the years I have known you and I am so proud of you for all you have done. I don’t know what is next for you but I know you will do it with dignity and strength Much love

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Thanks Rachel 💙 I have no idea what's coming up next here either, but it keeps it exciting for ALL OF US! If anything, my life has never... ever proven to be boring. Not for a second 😆

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May 20Liked by Brandy (Grumble Farm)

❤️💙❤️

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